Aarzoo..

Aarzoo..

Sapnon ke aakash tale, kalpana ki hawaon se door

Palkon ke saaye tale, nazar ki parchaiyon se door..

Ehsaas ke kadmon tale, aahaton ki dhakan se door

Aawazon ke daayre tale, raat ki arzoo se door..

Jise dhoondti hai neegahain , kya wahi ho tum..

girti baarish ki boondon tale, badalon ki chadar se door

behti hawaon ki narmiyon tale, jagti huyi kamna se door..

jaagte huye armanon ke tale, soti huyi jannat se door

saath nibhane ki chaah tale, har subha ki arzoo se door.

Jise dhoondti hai neegahain, kya wahi ho tum..

Bhawna ki bheeni khushbu tale, umang ki us raah se door

Jeewan ki mannaton tale, dooriyon ki deewaron se door

Chahaton ki muskaan ke tale, sundar se us ghar se door

Khushi ke har sagar tale, khamoshi ki arzoo se door..

Jise dhhondti hai neegahain, kya wahi ho tum..

Thamti saason ke tale, geeli un neegahon se door

Jise dhoondti hai neegahain , kya wahi ho tum..

Jeene ki sabhi aashaon tale, muskurahat ki kiran se door

Jise dhoondti hai neegahain, kya wahi ho tum..

Komal chandni ke tale, nisha ki mand mehek se door

Jise dhoondti hai neegahain, kya wahi ho tum..

Arzoo ki is chaah tale, Arzoo ki in sabhi arzuon se door

Jise dhoondti hai neegahain, kya wahi ho tum…

Akanksha ..

Ps: This is my first attempt to write something in hindi.

I know I suck at it, nevertheless.. I tried..to give word to my feelings..

Dreams as our guiding language, past life, and their relation with the present day life..


Does past life really exist? Do dreams convey anything that could actually help us in reality? Do they affect our present in any way?

Well, after conducting a little research on thought patterns of people and what they think about re-birth, dreams as a directing language and their importance in our present day life, across delhi and chandigarh, I got a mixed response, around 50% people(age group 25-45) strongly believed in existence of past life and how, what we did in our past life might affect our present life as well however they claimed of dreaming irregularly, while only 30 % people(age group 16-25) supported the notion of existence of any such thing as past life but they did show a willingness to be interested in dreams analysis, and then 20% included those who said, ‘we don’t really care’.

With the ongoing activities in our life, we don’t really care of what we did in past and if our past doings resulted in what we are today, with whom and what we possess.

And yet when life’s uncertain ways are suddenly revealed to us taking our loved ones away from us, then a normal tendency to attain sadness in our expressions takes over us and then people naturally tend to think all over again about the person lost and how their life has been unfortunate enough to lose them.

As we are brought closer to having belief in some power above, such unfortunate happenings might make us look at life in a different perspective altogether.

Sadness when pursued attains a fixity.


As I talked to some of the people who said they take their dreams seriously, I was in a fever pitch as they told many dreams that actually came true in their lives. From my personal experience with my dream cycle, I wanted to believe them. They were not sure although that their dreams always suggest something or do come true and yet they agreed that they do provide a direction in one way or the other. Since there has been no evidence for dreams being our guiding language, we can only rely on our senses and without biasing our thoughts can justify our dreams after the happening of events.

Yes, its not essential that we need to seek a meaning in our dreams before anything happens in our life. For starting off with the dream analysis, we can just notice things happening around in our life and then see if the dreams that you saw previously indicated anything related or resembling to what happened in your life.

Some of the people who liked writing, suggested on maintaining a dream diary. Although, only a few people confessed of dreaming regularly.

For others job tension, hectic days, family concerns and other important aspects lead to a fitful sleep. And once a while they dreamt and that too they are unable to recall as they wake up.

Nor that analyzing our dreams and understanding them is the quintessence of living life perfectly; its meaning and chase interests those who dream regularly and have felt them coming true right there in front of their eyes.

Only a few knew about past life therapy which aims to make you remember what all happened in your past life, I personally don’t believe in this, but dreams yes, have been a guiding language for me, that made me conduct this research.

It was interesting. And yet as amazing as the idea of getting to know about the future through dreams sound, its scary as well, coz dreams are not always good.

They are relative to death as well. Unfortunately, I have seen two such dreams so far where my two close friends lost their grandfathers and I knew about it. But could never tell, thinking that I might just hurt them or make them lose their hope that they will recover. It kills you to acknowledge that you saw them dying and could do nothing. I could do nothing.

Dreams give no surety.

All starts and ends with a belief.


Till the time you believe, everything exists..

However am curious to know how many of us here have actually felt the dreams coming true and if they believe in dreams as a guiding language.

Akanksha Chaudhary..

rains..

rains! yes, they are finally here..

Clouds.. dark..yet bright as they can lighten up my old beliefs in love and life once again..

settled and determined.. yet as they move calmly bearing their identities.. they always return to me.. hug me with all their care as they cover the entire house.. a domiciliary visit, expresses the air in its jealous constitution..

coming back home.. it actually was..

as the drops started to fall, clouds, ingenuous, were flown a little away from my dwelling. Air, innocuous, suggested me to keep away from feeling any care or new drops of the new rainy sky.

And yet provided a medium to those drops to fall on me.. allowed the rain to come down and wash away my tears.. everything is meant to be cared for in this world.. beings, birds, trees, property, identities, relations, possessions, everything needs a careful eye.. to stay preserved.. nature is one holy link to this bonding .. it suggests, attempts, display and direct..


as the trees were made fresh again, as the flowers were touched with love, as my feelings were freshened in that rain if hope, as nature has once again touched my soul.. it brought me closer to my own self of volition.. to that self.. which recognized love, care and beliefs in the lord above..

something’s blindside the important aspects of our life, self-less care, though easy to say than follow surely lets us feel the real meaning of love in our lives.. not a word it is, that you can just say and forget and then feel again.. its something that stays unsaid.. untold.. conveyed only through eyes of your heart..

as my schoolmates came over that rainy day, we all danced away in the rain, after so long, I could feel the kid in me, that same kid who would dance around, joyfully, without even any slightest consciousness of who’s watching you.. music that we played nurtured our senses.. as we all conversed our lives listening to music.. lying on the lawn.. under those shady trees.. we realized what life is.. and what friendship is.. it was beautiful.

Shubha Mudgil’s ‘ab ke saawan aise barse..’ was our all time favorite and also ‘garaj baras saawan ghirayoo..’ many songs we listened all lighted up our spirits as the rains drops fell.. and made us all feel vibrant and ever so aware of ourselves and our beliefs and our lives!!
I made my friend listen to this b’ful song from the movie..phir milenge.. ‘jeene ke ishaare mil gaye..bichre the kinare mil gaye..many times..
love this song..

As the clouds rested in the clear sky , sun came out shyly, all silent and saffron holding the hands of those grey clouds.. being with love and in love, even sun silences its ire of fire.. love always stays..



Akanksha..

not glowing alone..

akanksha..

lighting up my hidden self..

akanksha..

after>> the silent possession of those rainy clouds..

akanksha..

Miami pics..

these are some of the pics my cousin took.. i love clouds so much..

akanksha..

ummm..clouds.....

the treeline of the cloudy sky..

can i move on where they fly on..

or do they always follow the words of my eyes..

akanksha..

livin by the sand.. i hope they fly like that too sumday..

akanksha..

if water cud bear my reflection of love forever.i wud stay in that reflection forever....

sum new light? or sum light of the grown up past?

akanksha..

This life's like this...

This Life’s Like this..

No Body’s A Real Loner..

She held my hand with a great delight and he came towards me with that beam of happiness shining in his eyes. Yes, I was a stranger to them, still they held my hand.. and recognized my true concern.

Happiness knows no relations..

They were called ‘mentally handicapped’ by the so called ‘healthy’ beings. What does it take being a healthy human being? Having intellect? Pride? Confidence? Thoughts? Senses? Rationality? Lifestyle? Job? Self-Reliance? Except for having ‘perfect’ senses they have it all..

The happiness that they feel in their ignorance of perfection sometimes appear to be more satisfying than what we as conscious individuals appear to experience.

Ignorance is a sweet quilt of satisfaction..

Working with the people of Muskaan, an NGO in Delhi, for mentally and physically handicapped children, my menorah was lighted up by their spirits and its warm flame still lights up my heart when I get sad for little things in life.. How small our problems seem to be when I think of my friends there.. how they enjoy life to the fullest.. how mellifluous their whispers sound.. when they converse and joke around..

It’s not that they don’t have feelings, even they get engaged in a melee every now and then but someone amongst them always comes up to settle everything.. they recognize every one who works with them so well.

Recognition, of any sort, is perhaps something that attaches us more with the people we work with..

I usually get attached to people whose beliefs match up with mine real soon, and yet I had never thought that people there at the NGO would ever miss me when I am gone.. and yet as we all went there to say them goodbye the last day of our college, Khushbu, a beautiful girl of twelve, who’s always smiling, held my hand, made me sit on the stairs near the playground, and called me didi for the first time, I swear like a new ‘relation- lore’ has been handed to me just now..

She had her face in the opposite direction and as always never faced me all the time as she talked.. she is shy.. she told me how much she would miss laughing and playing with me.. and as I hugged her, a tear fell on my hand.. I was quite. I looked at her, kissed her on the forehead, and promised to come back soon. I stayed with her late till eve until her parents came to pick her up.

Whenever I think of her now, those eyes, wet and soft shaped keep coming to my mind.. Some moments are so precious that they chase you no matter where you might go, because that real care captures your heart and heart never stops reminding.. Now I hope that she has not forgotten me.. I am sure she hasn’t.. and even if she has, I am more than willing to spend as much time as I can to re-live that joy, innocent laughter and her kid-like talks.

I miss her..

Some people, situations, moments, glance, conversation, touch, feeling, often leave a strange ‘forever’ kind of impression in our lives. It touches and changes us in many ways.

People we let in, in our life, can either change us, or change themselves or just silently hold our hand accepting us the way we are and love and stay..

Akanksha..

The Mystical Night..

shhh....

The Roseate Drops of Newness..

Akanksha..

Hmmmmmmmm.........

Akanksha..

A New Beginning...

Akanksha..

Fading Countenance of Certain Expectations in Life..

Akanksha..

The Thought Lane..

Stepping anxiously up and down the First Thought Lane..

Heart suddenly stopped seeing the
proscenium space..
saw you standing there
ever so anxious to draw back
the curtain that would reveal me
I was but the motion, the eternal stage
Of your expression..
You stood over all above in the
Forefront..
The very initiation of my fantasy

My head bowed, silent like the sky I stood..
Nothing you said but saw, cherished and blessed the beauty..
Shy, willing, we both stood..
‘you will be loved’ came the sudden air’s
Emollient reply..
We were touched by the ambience
but said nothing..
no words could ever make me speak but silence
You knew..


Stepping smilingly with you on the Fourth Thought Lane..

Heart is awestruck in mirth
seeing us romping among the crowd..
disturbing with a greatest delight
everyone else, till dark we played..
little did I know being an obstacle
in each other’s path can ever be so exciting..
I tried searching for bowed heads, silent moments,
shy secret glances..
god! Could fine none!
Twenty four hours, and everything was changed
Between us..

standing with lots of candies were you
on the rostrum..
laughed out loud then both of us..
when the only reward, prize or epithet
that could ever be given to you
was known by everyone else to be
ME
‘I will trouble you as long as I can’, I said..
Sipping the rose’ through
Those smiling lips..
How they laugh! How they pretend!
How damn happy!
muttered the ones against love
kids in love can never be damned
by anyone
defended our lord..

No pretense can ever hold me back
But a strong kid-like arrogance in love
You knew..


Stepping lovingly on the Eighth Thought Lane….

I experienced heart beating in a new way..
seeing you living all in me
I was heightened till eternity to live
Seeing you dwelling near me
I was brought closer to reality..
managed I to re-live those kidding
exciting and teasing moments..
waiting am I for the second set of thought lane
to get constructed

no, not a palace, but a content walled
deeply bricked, soft-warmly colored, house of our memories
made prosperous with beautiful trees.. and innocent shrubs
seasoning it with lots of fresh love very other season..
No grand empty mansion could ever attract me, but a
Dimly lit, all embracing
house with your presence
You knew…

Akanksha..

(no comments please.. :) !!)