The wish that once was.. .
A wish is mine and a wish is yours
what I do calling my own reflects you oh love
a part of me alone where I get to see not..
"That's my wish!" or "I am going to do what I want to" sounds quite assuring when one is going through the ‘am strengthening myself’ phase of their life.. Asserting our self, our thoughts and then finally our own identity on to an altogether new set of conditions and people in life can really end up complicating almost everything .
Now what’s really this ‘my wish’? Does it exist at all? Or do we always get to do what we want to? During the self actualization phase when we seemingly do things that we want to, are we really taking decisions and stepping on our own footprints or unconsciously after being influenced by family, friends and situations we are doing what might be the reflection of many ideologies that we have agreed on to or not while on our way to get to know life?
Well, yes, life is surely a question!
Sometime back I got down to think that life is not really a mystery and there are really no unknown passages or secret doorways that we are destined to unravel as and when the right time comes.. and also came above to believe that through knowing the meaning of our dreams we can really get to know which way life is going to lead us… and also the possibility of knowing whom are we going to come across in life..
Now when I believed in my dreams, they really guided me well.. To let my conscience know I even started writing my dreams the moment I woke up.. and that really sorted out things in my heart for true. After a week or two.. I did get to know something about the people in my life, about places am yet to discover and about people I am yet to meet. All this was going great and I was so close to strengthening my self and thoughts.
But reality got me and after a while I realized that the reality, the immediate surrounding that we live in has such a strong presence that it can extricate us from our deepest past and melancholy and from the thoughts and vision of our most passionate future. What actually gives the present so much of power over the most adamantine possession that we have: thoughts?
What is with us really is. And what is not, can be but not right away.
The present, which has people walking , talking, eating, laughing and just doing something has a certain motion and a force about it that it seems to bring back one from the past they wish to live in or from the future that they dream of. It says ‘ am right here, take me’. And since this force is sitting right there with the time and you got to face it the moment you wake up, it tends to make seem all the dreams as dreams alone. Something seen when there is not much active force surrounding us. And once the mysterious charm of tracking down life through unknown ways and unspoken glances is questioned and asked to justify its presence, well the wall comes in and therein dissolves all the thoughts bridging the present with the future.
Acceptance without questioning, not everyone can do.
And those who can accept it can really live their life. . because at night when we lose our self to sleep , we dream.. its the only thing that comes our way unasked.. it knocks on our door and silently takes us away and makes us experience.. it asks us not our wish… but represents it somewhere in the moments that it makes us to live… that’s how a wish is truly expressed ..
and the same goes for people in our life.. we can go on saying every single day ‘hey that’s my wish or I wanna do it that way’ but just like in our actions of so called ‘following our own will’ we reflect the wishes of our dear ones and so do they… just that we don’t get to know this that easily.. and even if we do.. well… do we really believe that ? Naa… !! We don’t wanna make life issueless.. right?
A wish when seen by another wish remains no more a dream. What is not a dream, becomes the present, a reality..
Akanksha Chaudhary
